Thursday, March 10, 2011

So... Not a Thumbs Up Then?

"Watching Battle: Los Angeles is like watching other people play a video game.  It looks cool for a while, but it quickly becomes tiresome." - Richard Roeper.

 Roger Ebert, longtime host of "Siskel and Ebert" (then after Gene Siskel's death "Ebert and Roeper") just released his review of the somewhat anticipated film Battle: Los Angeles.

Personally, it wasn't a film that I was too intrigued in, primarily because it reminded me far too much of the recent Aliens attack us and we're all going to die film Skyline (which incidently was ultimately just an 80 minute or so trailer, not an actual movie).

After reading Ebert's review, I feel pretty safe skipping this film.

His review is honestly one of the most scathing reviews that I have ever read.

Here are a few of the choicer quotes...

"Battle: Los Angeles" is noisy, violent, ugly and stupid.

The aliens are hilarious. Do they give Razzies for special effects?... they look like stick figures whipped up by apprentice animators.

You gotta see the alien battleships in this movie. They seem to have been assembled by the proverbial tornado blowing through a junkyard.

When I think of the elegant construction of something like "Gunfight at the OK Corral," I want to rend the hair from my head and weep bitter tears of despair. Generations of filmmakers devoted their lives to perfecting techniques that a director like Jonathan Liebesman is either ignorant of, or indifferent to. Yet he is given millions of dollars to produce this assault on the attention span of a generation. 

 His conclusion is extremely scathing...

Young men: If you attend this crap with friends who admire it, tactfully inform them they are idiots. Young women: If your date likes this movie, tell him you've been thinking it over, and you think you should consider spending some time apart.


Until Next Time, thank you Roger Ebert for turning the movie review into an art form, especially where crappy B-movies involving aliens attacking are concerned.

No comments:

Post a Comment